Everyday Influence and Dale Carnegie

 This week we looked over some of the tips listed from Dale Carnegie's book "How to Win Friends and Influence People"

One tip out of the list that I've seen others use on me is #18 "Be sympathetic with other people's ideas and desires". Often times when people do this, they tend to be painting a picture of agreement in hopes of persuading me. I find this tactic incredibly irritating because unless the person is honestly in agreement with the ideas and desires in question the behavior comes off and transparent and manipulative. My experience may not be as the "rule" was intended, but that seems to be the only way I've seen it used: a proverbial "wool over my eyes".

A tip that I find myself using often is #17 "Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view". I think that this tip is effective and necessary. It's impossible to intelligently navigate through an issue from one perspective; by trying to see things from the perspective of others, you can catch things or important points you would have otherwise missed. Part of the reason this is so useful is because it lends to effective communication and can show the other party that you are paying attention to them and open to a two-way dialogue. Essentially, it can prevent a communication breakdown.

A tip that I could start to use is #23 "Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly". I find it difficult to avoid the blunt approach and in truth, it likely does me little justice. Part of this trouble is a product of my own personal philosophy of always accepting the potential to improve; I forget that people often take things personally and aren't pleased to hear about the negatives. It's happened in times past where people would interpret my bluntness as a statement of my superiority to them which has almost never been the case. I think implementing number 23 into my life will take a lot of patience and self-control; to be continued.